Today's adventure in parenting involved going to a Lactation Consultant. Our little Maria bug is not putting on the lbs like she should so we set up an appointment with the best lactation consultant in town.
The lady was very nice and had a proper English accent. The room that she did her consult in was very Cotswold, with flowered wallpaper. It was a bit like having Mary Poppins lecturing you on the proper latch and suckle.
We came out of it with two pieces of knowledge. First, Maria does not like to open her mouth wide. Second, there is not enough milk being produced to have her gain weight.
My homework is to sit with bug while she is alert and open my mouth and say "Open Wide". I have been doing that quite a bit with her. I got tired of just saying the words and making the face, so now I add an "Awwww" while I have my mouth open as if I were having my tonsils checked. I don't think I am making any headway, but the consultant said it would take a couple of days. We will see.
In order to boost production Amelia had to rent a pump. Whatever Amelia gets out of the pump we will feed to Maria.
At this point we are willing to do anything to get her to gain some weight.
Like Cold Play once crooned "Nobody said it was easy, but nobody said it would be this hard".
Hopefully, she will go from a 7lb 3 ounce weakling to an 8 lb behemoth.
Beefcake!!! Beefcake!!! - Eric Cartman
